The Road Not Taken…

April 29th

Today’s Showa Day, so it’s a public holiday in Japan. I can definitely sighed a relief because it’s holiday on Wednesday – the day that I always wish to be holiday. Because I’d have 輪講 (a discussion where you have to translate English text into Japanese) and 雑誌会 (a presentation on the journal/thesis related to your research or those you have the interest to share with others). The latter is now done by the Masters & PhDs but later it’ll be my turn. They put me at the very end of the year so I can take my time to learn from others’. Phew! I hate presentation! And I’m totally no good at translating those articles which full with scientific terms!

Ok. So I didn’t have to go lab today. It’s holiday but my eyes were trained to wake up at 7 am, the latest it could be. It’s weird, but yeah it’s GOOD too. I can do a little room cleaning. Oh! You don’t know how my house could be on the weekdays!

I have an appointment with my senior. I asked her to draft me a resume sample or CV. I need it for the upcoming Career Fair I have in Tokyo this Golden Week*. And I might have to prepare the application letter too since there’ll be interview under SPA. Oh my. I just realize I’m the same person with the last 6 years. I totally HAVE NO confidence in myself when it comes to INTERVIEW or such. The things that meant to appeal yourself to others, generally it’d be my weakest point 😦

I talked to Mom last night for about one and half hours on the phone. Mom said she already went to bed because she’s too tired. We talked on so much things but apparently things about ME.  I touched on my intention to bring her here living with me if I happened to work or continue my study (master course) here but she seemed to refuse. Yeah why wouldn’t I tolerate and give in to her suggestion for now, ain’t I? No, I didn’t mean to be selfish. Maybe I’m just forgotten that someone still need me.

“I won’t have that much time left. I just hope that I can spend that little time being closed to you, near to you and you’re near to me…. ‘coz I don’t have anyone else to rely on. But I won’t force you to do anything. It’s totally yours… the decision is to be made by you”

That’s what she told me. I really really hate it when she mentioned about the “not much time left”. You know what I mean up there guys. But instead I’m afraid I’m the one “running out of time” to repay what she’d done to make me now standing here. 

So! I’m going to go back to where I belonged after my graduation. It’s not the final decision yet. But that’s my plan for now. Any moment, everything’s can change… I know it better than anyone else. But for now, I’ve to stick to that. I have to.

So my Ec’s Harabuji-to-be Kawasaki have to prepare the farewell card & party for me huh? Should I wait the day to return what his done to me, Ec? Yeah, to hand him a box of tissue (when he cried) because I’m leaving! *rofl* 😛 I would never forget that thing. Coz I never been handed a tissue when I cried before. Kiddin’ Ec. Oh yeah~ should grab the chance while it last huh? Till then guys!

p/s : Golden Week : A four-day continuous holiday from May 3rd to May 6th every year.


2 thoughts on “The Road Not Taken…

  1. haniz says:

    mau join your golden week!! argh sekarang bukan masanye untuk menyesal aniz krana tak pilih jepun sebagai destinasi sambung degree…tsk tsk tsk..buahaha~~*enoughanez.ketukdirisendiri* anyway, yeah rubi. take a break. balik umah lepak2 ngan mak.kumpul sume tenaga yg ada.pastu datang balik dan do your best!! (tu cadangan yg ada dalam pale otak saye saje je taip kat komen ni nak bagi rubi bace.) hahahahahahaha~~~~mamat ala2 changmin boleh tunggu.yg penting kite hepi~lalalalalalaa~

    • E.V says:

      ahahahaha. you’re right. i have to believe in this one thing. if it meant to be mine, no matter how hard or rough times i will have to go thru, it’d be mine. if it’d not, no matter how hard i’ve had try, it won’t be mine. so what i have to do is, to try my best to what i think it’s best for me now. to have it or not, it’s none of my business. and my mom always said this too.

      “every good thing you worked for it’ll become true, it’s none the matter of time”

      and i should take note, that the “good” thing there is GOOD defined by Him the Almighty, not what being defined by me, right?

      thanks for the comment aniz! 🙂

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